I'll be Back...

I've been missing in action for a week now...changing dsl providers...new phone number...and a new move...so life has been keeping me busy...then on Saturday...my mom took sick...seriously ill...had to be admitted to hospital...so I'm dealing with that as well...among all the other things I do...

So be patient with me for a spell and as soon as I get back to me being me with my daily routine...you'll read more of me...

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"Justice is the constant and perpetual will to allot to every man his due." - Domitus Ulpian

Dropplings of the "new"

Sometimes there's nothing going on but your daily routine....then sometimes, once in a while your daily routine is permeated with dropplings of "new" folk...and if you like which is "new" you explore the possibilities...somewhat like my friend "brilliantbydesign"...I'm so happy for him...he's coming into his own and deserves to be loved and to give love...

On the other side of the coin...there's me...my dropplings have been more than sporadic lately...as I've released myself from the vestiges of hope from my ex...and accepted two dates...one with a mate and the other with a woman...both were great dates...but I realized I still wasn't ready yet to be serious with anyone...I guess I still have issues...so it's just me, with me now...for now.


QUOTE OF THE DAY
"I never think of the future - it comes soon enough." - Albert Einstein

Living the Quote...

Commencing this weekend I'm going to employ the quote for today...there's some leisure I want...no...I need to have very soon...preparation and diligence is the key to achieve this...I'm going to take care of business here so that business can take care of me there...

Have a great weekend...

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"Employ thy time well, if thou meanest to get leisure". - Benjamin Franklin

How do You...

How do you feel when you see someone that you-- sorta like/have a sample of crush on--that you haven't been introduced to...hmmm....do you still have wet dreams about them...lol

Yesterday, I was formally introduced to someone that I've never had a conversation with but have seen around for a minute and awhile....he point blankly asked me this question and said I was the answer to that question for them...I thought that was a cute come on line...of course I was not biting being the good catholic that I am...the mate has humor, handsome...one can tell the gym has the better portion of his time...plus from all accounts the mate has skills in professional department...

I like the question...so I thought I would put it out there...cause I'm guilty...

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"Self-respect is the cornerstone of all virtue." - John Herschel

Another Love gone Bad...

The fresh cool breeze coming from the ocean this morning revitalize my senses...I felt at peace with nature on my run in the sand...the calming silence of the moments I spend with me and nature is so refreshing and it gives me a great perspective on the day and my thoughts...

I'm booked to go to LA in a couple of weeks...I'm really looking forward to it...my last time there I caught the guy I was seriously dating...dating someone else...he walked right by me and a friend at the club...as he never expected me to be in town...funny thing though...his date recognized me (I never met the guy in my life) but it obviously told me he saw my photos at "A's" abode...so "A" turns around and let go of the guy's hand...and tried to make small talk with me...I'm fuming at this point...but he wouldn't have known...for my demeanor never changed...
I told him to have a good night and my friend (drop the linen and stop the grinning) went into the club for a minute...I wasn't really feeling the club so we went outside and walked to the car... "A" pulls up to the car...with his date in the car...and tells me...we need to talk...and I'm like yeah yeah...then "A" says like...right now...and I was like...No...so my friend told me to get in the car and we went home..."A" drops his date somewhere...must have been close by...as when we got home and just opened the door..."A" pulls up...so my friend tells me...he doesn't want him in the house...so I need to handle my business...and he went inside leaving me to deal with some bullshit that I was not ready for...

Some background...sexually so far...there have been only two mates that have turned me out, leaving my toes curled and my eyes crossed...both of them are clean cut, educated-- got their shit together bad boy types...the only difference really between the two are their body types.
"A" has a somewhat controlling nature and doesn't take shit from anyone least of all any guy he dates...he knows how to man handle a man...lol...anyhow getting back to the story...

"A" wanted to go for a drive, I refused so we sat outside...and I didn't say anything...so he wanted to know what I was thinking...and I'm like...It's over--no explanation needed, you have your life and I have mine...at that point I was so emotionally spent and distraught...and in times like this...I just need to be by myself... but he insisted on talking to me...and then he touched me on my hand...it was so repulsive and I let loose...oh...did I let him have it...when I was finished he grabbed hold of me and kissed me so passionately...I was weak....

At the end of my trip...it was really over...I had two weeks to deal with him, our conversations, advice from my friend, my heart and mind...my mind won...and once again my heart lost...

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"People who ask our advice almost never take it. Yet we should never refuse to give it, upon request, for it often helps us to see our own way more clearly." - Brendan Francis

Tuesday's Tidbits

I have met some really kewl bloggers in blogsphere and rarely do I tell them how much I appreciate their comments and their virtual contact with me...so this morning...I want send my happy thoughts and shout outs to:

www.brilliantbydesign.blogspot.com,
www.koollikedat.blogspot.com,
www.seeggrow.blogspot.com,
www.sebpro.blogspot.com,
www.professorgq.blogspot.com

I also would like to send special shouts out to Jay Jay...my ghost writer and Lexus Decatur whose doing his do in Canada this week....JW....for keeping it real and me real...

I digress on to other matters....

My small circle of friends have this unspoken rule but not written in stone...that we would not date anyone the other has been intimate with...although there has been some mishaps...to this day one or two may not admit it...but before we were friends one or two of us dated the same people...and that's okay...the past is just that...the past...there's only one time known to me that a mate my cousin was interested in turn the tables on my cousin after meeting me...and I sort of dated him for a spell (of course with my cousin's permission)...they weren't intimate...

However we do have some exteriors friends who will sleep with your lover...if the opportunity arises...it's all trade to them!...I scratch to hurt so they don't play that shit with me...

Funny thing though...three out of four of my friends have different preferences when it comes to male attraction...and one of my friends share the same taste in mates as I do...problematic there...lol...so it's like first come, first hit on basis...decides who travels down that road...I'm not saying we never had a glitch...but we were able to work it out...friendship is far more important than a piece of ass...

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"Life is far too important a thing ever to talk seriously about." - Oscar Wilde

No limits...

What do you do when your all out of love with no more love to give?
This was said to me last night...without being told or understanding the circumstances...I told the person one might as well be stone cold and buried six feet under..., it may seemed rather insensitive but for me there's merit in the statement..., love is a powerful emotion when we truly love someone...and even when love presents severe challenges....there is still love whether it be intense or minimal...there is still love.

Although one may be single...the capacity to love and the desire to do so is still there..., Even in a recent parting of two...there is still love...disappointment and varied emotions may exist...but there is still love...

On the other hand...my friend who asked the question...explained that he always thought that true love had no limits and he realized that with his lover...this was not the case..., the brotha was having doubts fused with issues..., I explained to him this is normal...search your soul and goals...and then remember why you fell in love in the first place with this person...in the end you'll find that not all is lost...you just have to evolve...

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"Nurture your mind with great thoughts; to believe in the heroic makes heroes." - Benjamin Disraeli

The Weekend -- Unfinished

Thursday...the holdiay festivites began...

After a meeting of minds for a proposed project...I put on my red tens...with a matching short zip red & white polo by ferragamo...some dkny blue j's...armed with a cup of rum & coke ... Garfi and me were on our way to the local joint...where boys meet...hung out with a few friends...Garfi knew this twenty something so called straight boy...who at one point was a guest at Her Majesty prison...but now a confused boy with a penchant for boygina...but hates the label "gay"...hmm...Petri, one of our road dawgs...took a liking to the youngen...but the youngen took a liken to me...and was desparately trying to get my attention...of course I wasn't having it...don't do youngens...youngen was so bold...got up, came over one seat to where I was...and tried to holla at me and at the same time rub his knee into my groin...confidence... I give him that...but touching the jewels ordain for greatest in the bedroom...a la no no...I had to open the bible according to dajardin...and lay out the penalty of law for the youngen...he calmed down and got respectful...after more than a few libations, flirting and socializing the gang of us departed for work was in the morning...

The just got paid Friday...was off the chain...the boy bar was jumping and brought out a few crypto-nites...lol...guys that you haven't seen since the sailing of Noah's Ark...it was good playing catch up and comparing notes...after chit & chat along with guzzling drinks...we all headed down to the hole in wall...after 2am...where the dj theme song "dutty wine" had the walls shaking from the booty holding patrons providing insane drama doing this dance...it seemed like high school was still in session...the youngen's were ruling...except for...

Twelve years my senior
could be my mentor --
instead...my suitor

Now we talking my speed...a professor of law...could easily pass for forty something...just enough game in him...to cross examine and wear down the witness...lol...

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"Incompetents invariably make trouble for people other than themselves." - Larry McMurtry

Questions...I dislike

Why is a nice good looking guy like you single?..., Don't you just hate that question...have you ever thought about or come up with an answer for that question...I get that question all the time...and I'm like...being single is choice for me...it's not that... possibile suitors are not out there for me...is just that my destiny hasn't caught up with me yet...so in the mean time and between time I do me...

Another one I hate and quite frankly sometimes do not answer..., How long was your last relationship? or How many relationships have you had? ..., In my mind...I'm thinking is this a pre-requisite to dating this person or what...I failed to see the revelance of this question...and how in any way shape or form is this going to play into this scenario...

After one or two dates...some people fall in lust/infactuation...not love...hardly...but there are some that hold claim to that fame..., the getting to know period is never ending...my closest friends will tell you...it takes about five years before I consider you a friend...and even then...we're still evolving as true friends..., Dating and getting to know one another increases the chances of a relationship or none at all...this period is undetermined...but if there's a mutual feeling between two people, a connection both physically and mentally...and both of you decide to move on...you will still be on a journey to getting to know each other..."to know me is to live with me"...


QUOTE OF THE DAY
"We should be taught not to wait for inspiration to start a thing. Action always generates inspiration. Inspiration seldom generates action." - Frank Tibolt

Just Talk

You ever wondered why most often than not...when a few gay men gather together for party, a drop by...or simply just out...the topic usually centers around MEN...either being single or not being able to find a good man...or both...just like women we too lament...lately I've dismissed myself from these types of topics...because I hear the same cry over and over again...and usually get myself in trouble for my opinion...which doesn't settle with most sensibilities...

I be like...nigga please...firstly you need to drop your standards and settle...status is nothing compared to lonliness...I don't mean settle for a drug addict or a no good for nothing person not looking to elevate and evolve himself...but I do mean...he doesn't have to have house but an apartment, a mercedes or bmw but a pinto, he doesn't have to make six figures...five would do...Think about it...come with me now...what is it you really want...someone to respect you...someone to cuddle with when you come home at night from a long days work, a cooked meal once in a while, the warm exciting feeling of someone next to you in the night, someone to call your own...a never ending romance...to travel, to experience, to grow old with...all of these things are possible...but we go into these relationships with too much baggage and lose sight of what truly matters...

So when I hear....

He said…, You said…, drama silhouetted the space…, anger and hurt permeates the soul…, tears raining the face…, he said…you said…it’s over…you pack your shit and your memories and you walk out the door…forever

I start to stepping...It’s sad but happy time…for in the end you still have you…suck it up and then find a date...lol!

QUOTE OF THE DAY
Happiness depends upon ourselves. -Aristotle

Four Square and the Historian

I had this major crush and affinity for this phine historian in NC...with me, once I'm into someone...I'm into them...This one time on my last evening with historian, he surprised me and took me out to dinner...knowing my love for French and Italian foods...we ended up at Four Square on Chapel Hill Road...when we arrived at the restaurant, I fell in love instantly with the old colonial style two story house that the restaurant was situated in...the decor on the inside and the impeccable service and attention to detail reminded me of home where this is the norm for fine dining...the art work, the fire place, the initimate coziness and the wine made this evening special for me...I was with historian...whom I simply adored...it was more my affection for him than his for me...he liked me but he didn't share the same feelings that I had...and his non verbal confirmation of that was evident...it was a beautiful night nonetheless...

Historian, a socialite had a few friends...and if history served me right...his friends are fierce and down right sometimes evil..., On my last visit out to see historian... I arrived at the airport and he was not waiting to collect me as usual...he knew I was coming and what time...I tried calling him but he never answered his phone...I spent four hours waiting for him...so I called one of his oldest friends, who incidentally on my last visit told me point blank he liked me...and that the historian was not the one for someone like me...I politely thanked him and then let him know that that was my decision and mine alone...now whatever happened between the time I left the last time up until I arrived that afternoon was unknown to me...I wonder if you could imagine how mad I was that he did not come for me...nor call me...so I called his friend who told me that he did not know where historian was...but historian told him I was coming...I got the impression something went down...when his friend picked me up from the airport and said he didn't know what historian problem is...of course you know it was drama all the way... at 8:05 pm...historian arrived at his friends house after receiving a phone call from his friend...historian comes inside...I'm in the kitchen and says to me...Are you staying here or are you going with me...with such distaste...he was down so many strikes it was unbelievable...so I held my cool like the good catholic I am...got my overnight bag and proceeded with him to his apartment...

Once we arrived at his abode...you can believe...it was on...needless to say it was my last visit to NC....

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"No passion in the world is equal to the passion to alter someone else's draft." - H. G. Wells

The 911

Another morn, another day in which to be thankful for the breath of life..., it's a holiday weekend...so what the hell am I doing up this early writing...simple...sleep evades me and my mind encourages thought...

A friend of mine left to take up employment in another island...so on Saturday, a few of us got together and took her out to a farewell dinner... it was hilarious and fun...recounting the times when we all work together, man-money-children problems and the daily grind of life. The food wasn't all that great but the company was off the chain...

Afterwards, I did the trek down to the local boy bar...to meet my best friend...hmm...so much stories to tell...but I leave them for another time...

If your partner left you with two kids...and disappears for over a year...but has called you sporadically during the year...shows up at your door at 10pm one night...expects to come in and get a "lil some sum"...., What would you do?....I know what I would...call 911!,...there's an intruder in the house....lol


QUOTE OF THE DAY
"You have to have confidence in your ability, and then be tough enough to follow through."- Rosalynn Carter

One, Two, Three and say Pickles!

Since I commenced blogging I've been asked...,

Do you have a photo? ...for the savvy ones... Do you have a most recent photo?

I decided what the hell...I'll post a new photo that the photographer snapped of me...just before the actual photo shoot I was hired to do...this past Tuesday...I'm not big on photos...as I did print modelling for a minute...for a parisian designer...

I've posted it in my profile...or "about me" ... I'll only keep it up for a spell and then down it goes...as I don't own the rights for this photo...

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"No degree of dullness can safeguard a work against the determination of critics to find it fascinating." - Harold Rosenberg