The Cap, The Robe and Destiny...

He did it!...he graduated last night...along with cousin...and all and sundry was so proud of them...I thank God for letting me be a part of last night to see my seed take another step in his destiny...

In my early years of employment, I met this beautiful, blue/greenish eye, more white than black woman...both of us were young...and worked at the same place as securities bookkeepers/reconciliation clerks...she was real nice to me, pleasant to all our colleagues, considerate, we even went out a couple of times...I liked her but she had a boyfriend...so we could go anywhere...she had a child...he was so beautiful, most people thought he was a girl...she died suddenly from sickle cell soon afterwards...one day we were both discussing our kids and work, having lunch and next day I came to work and was told she died earlier that morning...I was in shock for quite a spell and truly sad...this beautiful girl...dead...leaving behind this baby who will never know his mother...through his lifetime he's found out through others what his mom was like...

Last night at graduation...I was stunned when I heard Cindy's child name called and saw that young man graced that stage to receive his diploma and awards...I was truly touched by God's grace and mercy...I had forgotton all about him...and there he was and I could see her strong resemblance in her son's face...it brought me back to an olden day...I know right at that moment she was so proud of him, as I...


QUOTE OF THE DAY
"As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

A Full Heart

My head is clear but my heart is full...I sit and contemplate this proclivity which is "my life" and like american express...my life goes everywhere I go...so how dare you sit in judgement of me...how dare you mere mortal...tell me...that I am an abomination...blood courses through my vain as it does yours...just as in the days of old when men just like me, gifted with the art of the pen and thought kept and recorded words said by mere mortals to be translated and interpreted by modern day prophets--modern day translation--just mere mortals...who sometimes lest we forget were born in sin...as they teach....why is it that the so called Sunday dollar purveyors over the years don't tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth...why are there misappropriations of the facts...I hear quotes from this one and that one, rebuttals and comments that to all and sundry are cast in stone...but over the years that stone continually turns to dust...

My life is one of hope, hope for my son, hope for my family, hope for friends and hope for the world...I do not live my life for anyone other than me...so the constraints you place upon me doesn't impede who I am...it just simply stagnates the evolution of what will inevitably become a statement of fact--maybe not in my lifetime but in my brothers and sisters beyond my expirary date...

They say life comes full circle...this is something I truly believe...since b.c. the world has been in turmoil...fighting each other...right home in our own back yards were still fighting the fight--- race, equality and respect...

I am a human being, a good person....and I too...have a contribution to this world...no matter how mere mortals try and drive the nail in my cross...

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"That which we persist in doing becomes easier, not that the task itself has become easier, but that our ability to perform it has improved." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Prosing on "K"

There are a few blogs that I read daily...and these blogs vary like night and day...I read one this morning but I chose not to comment...although I wanted to...but I have my reasons why..., all I can say is life is short and every day is not promised to us...so if there's something you want or you know you need...be honest with yourself, go after it, communicate with the other person about your feelings so that your free flow can become your action flow and you "do the damn thing"... enough said...for I've now put my feet in my mouth!

I like what I like when I like it
That in itself may be selfish
but who cares besides me

Continually when we least expect it, someone comes along that captures our attention...we don't actually know it at first as most often than not, we're not looking...but then...it happens and you take note...

First it was nothing
and then, something
Thought out words forming
a sentence
That soon transform into a
paragraph

Something inside you smiles...and you get this warm feeling...I can't explain it but you know when it's special...and then you start...wanting that feeling more...so you communicate with whatever or whomever it is...that opens your soul to that happiness...

One day turns into two
Two turns into three
and so on...
When will it stop...you say
Not now...for there's still
so much mystery

As unpredictable as life is...I like life...even with it's daily challenges...and peoples...there's always something to muse over... like special people that become a part of your daily mental...and you wish special things for them and with them...the mental is good that way...it stimulates and invigorates...

Now I'm left with just time
time for me to figure out
if this is...just virtual
--or where--
do I want to go with this...
if at all...

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"The fragrance always remains in the hand that gives the rose." - Heda Bejar

Lips..

It's summer and mother nature keeps reminding me that she can do whatever the hell she wants when she wants to...hence, this summer rain...it's only a week since summer rolled in and she then gone for a couple of days and gave the trees, grass and all things of nature a good drink...not bad at all...except that getting my early morn relaxing runs in the sand is helter skelter...but I aint mad at her... just watching the drizzle fade away...gives me hope to run another day...

Here I am this early am...with nothing to do...tripping and remember the photo of...,

His lips, those lips
causes my mind to trip
A photo brought me near
I was able to trace the outline
with my index without fear

Those succulent looking lips
are meant to tease the unsuspecting
drawing you in, transcending you in thought
making you want to be close, very close
skimming the edges without touching

Alas, you remember it's only a photo
for the real lips are far away and not yours
But destiny....oh destiny
grant me a wish, a wish of those ---
lips.


QUOTE OF THE DAY
"A mind troubled by doubt cannot focus on the course to victory." - Arthur Golden

Being Social

Mine was a weekend of fullfilling my social calendar...there are just a few parties or gatherings that if I was available I would attend...and this such weekend...I obliged...what a weekend it turned out to be..., I even took the opportunity to indulge in a date...a dinner date at Cafe Matise... I haven't dated in a spell and she's been hinting at me for the last two months...so I decided what the hell...plus it would be a way to get her off my back...This woman has it together...so much so...it borders perfection...so it seemed..., a college education, a career she loves, a house, a car but no husband...at least not yet..., for a first date she was incredible...sexy...communicative...just enough flirt to let you know she likes you more so than before..., this was danger zone territory...a brotha hasn't grooved in a minute, I was feeling her real good and after a bottle of red wine my mojo was kicking in..., it wasn't her, it was me...my heart and proclivity lies elsewhere...

Then it was a 40-e-it birthday bash at a private residence on the beach...The host house was one of those ocean front homes found in MACO...complete with pool, disco room, a real square footage patio that overlook the ocean and ran the entire length of the house...when I arrived...it was girls, girls, girls all over the place in various modes of dress from ghetto fabulous to the very chic...from tooth pic thin to jelly roll cellulite...if one hundred people weren't up in the place...my name isn't what it is...A brotha was in pussy heaven...cause the women were in heat especially this young and sexy mocha sister...wearing an all white ensemble capping it off with daisy dukes with an ass that cut her g-string to pieces...she happened to be one of the hostesses...she played me so close...I had a hard time checking out my same gender hopefuls...

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"It is not necessary to understand things in order to argue about them." - Pierre Beaumarchais

It's Just Koollikedat

Today was a good day all around...it had it's peaks and valley but in the back of membrane I was thinking of a hat...no a cap...that's only worn for exemplfying the "kool" in a white wife beater... and it came to me sitting down having a breakfast sandwhich at work...it's the little things that remind you of how special life is..., we, as humans have the capacity to fall in love, out of love even to the point of being painstakingly heartbroken -- and yet-- fall in love all over again...

I was speaking to a friend today...and at present he's right where I was nine months ago...heartbroken and upset...questioning himself, the why, the what and how come..., this scene was all so familiar...all I could offer was reassurance that in time it will be alright...the anger and disappointment now will ease ... but the process before that time depends on you and how you value you...

It dawn on me later this afternoon...that allowing oneself to open up the windows to our so guarded souls...to captivate life and whatever it offers as opportunities to us...in little and big ways will enrich our very beings...making our lives fruitful...useful...and loving...

And talking about unsuspecting events...

You...him and your thoughts, Him...you and his thoughts..., innocent and captivating -- what excites is the unknown, the inevitable of what's to be ... maybe something maybe not... but it's nice now in this moment ...that's all one can dwell on...moments of thought keystrokes relaying over phone lines to the invisble...trusting that he notices the humor, the passion, the unexpected, the ambiguous flirt in every other word and those not said...

taken from the "k" files by DA

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"Men are equal; it is not birth but virtue that makes the difference." - Voltaire

We Never....

The figment of our imaginations are varied..., thus we see visuals and everybody else's lives around us and we wonder...when is our life going to start and be as exciting and loving as the next person..., but alas our lives have started, we just haven't used our creative juices to enhance our sensibilities...imagine and then make it happen...!

We never met

but his words were sexy

We never kiss

and yet, I could taste his lips

We never exchange numbers

but I have an idea of his area code

We never touch

for his only reach to me

is his incredible mind

We could only anticipate

each day... when "never"

becomes forever

taken from the thoughts of DA

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus." - Mark Twain

The Pastor's Donkey

The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again, and it won again. The local paper read: PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT!

The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race. The next day, the local paper headline read: BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ASS.

This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get ridof the donkey. The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent. The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day: NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN.

The Bishop fainted. He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for $10. The next day the paper read: NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10.

This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild. The next day the headlines read: NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.

The Bishop was buried the next day.

The moral of the story is...,being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery...and even shorten your life. So be yourself and enjoy life... Stop worrying about everyone else's ass and you'll be alot happier and live longer!

Have a nice day!

Don't You Hate "Goodbye"

He said "hello"...and that hello was the beginning of the end...it was this relationship I learnt the meaning of true unadulterated love and sharing...the relationship taught me how and what it is to love...not like...not pretend to be in love...not selfish...not in control..., his love, our love gave me a feeling of freedom, of caring, of doing what has to be done to make it work and to make life comfortable as possible for us...I became a true part of "we"... a "we" with meaning..., but somewhere down the line...I guess my love was too safe...emboding too many obstacles...challenging circumstances determined the depth of our love and committment...so it came to past...the beginning of the end...then he said "goodbye"...

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"The superior man is modest in his speech, but exceeds in his actions." - Confucius

Falling Short for Cravings...

We all fall short at times...that's just life...they say the mind is strong and a terrible asset to waste... but time and time again I have proven the flesh is weak...and sometimes stronger than the mind...I'm sure they're others that will dispute that statement...but my take would be that they must never have fallen short...saints...I called them!

Now I have a craving for chocolate and redbone...you know when your eating a good portion of bar-b-que chicken and you lose track and realize your actually nibbling on your fingers as it tastes so good...well then you get the picture of my craving..., since my departure from being a partner last September... I've been doing a lot of ME...and it's been great...besides the one time I messed up with someone so special...due to hangups with the ex...and the person rightly told me to... take care of your business before you press on...that is ... if they're still available...boy was I told...but it caused me to slow down...regroup and reapply just what it is... that makes me happy... I figured it out...ME...only me can make me happy..., and in doing me... one day at its own pace my walk alone with me will be complimented by a person of equal mental yoke...

Oh by the way...my primal craving is just that a craving that has caused me to fall short each and every time...I blame it on my needs...but a brotha has been celibate for a spell.. gratification comes in other forms...in the words of a friend who sent me an email this morning..."I think you are in need of a doctor who can examine your head."

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"How much easier it is to be critical than to be correct." - Benjamin Disraeli

Learn to Ignore

It seems for the last few days someone has tested and tried the last nerve in my body...at first I put them on blast because of the stupidity of the situation...in hindsight I was disappointed with myself...nobody should ever rile you that much that you lose it... so I decided I would ignore them...period...and it works!... I was reported to the VP for ignoring them...which led to a conclave with the VP, the person and myself...I had my day in court and thoroughly and I say thoroughly but professionally brought stability to the situation....Oh happy day..., that particular someone has since been transferred...I was tried, tested but now I have a testimony....all thanks to ignoring that person...

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"Learning to ignore things is one of the great paths to inner peace." - Robert J. Sawyer

Calling all Singles...

Single and looking for mature mate....was what the ad said...with an email address...., nowadays this ad for the most part would not yield the results expected..., you need the main ingredients--stats and photos..., oops I forgot...you have to be height & weight proportionate, tone or muscled and easy on the eyes....just a polite way of saying not ugly....and if you have all of the so called physical attributes on the criteria list....then comes the second stage....a job...a car...your own place...your own money...., it's no wonder why they're so many single gay men...

We place so many restrictions on the ideal mate and then when we find the "one" that embodies our criteria list...in the end something goes wrong and we're back to square one..., Single and looking for mature mate...

Can you imagine if we would just give each other a chance and get to know someone for who and what they are....as oppose to our "preferences"...., okay-- I know...I've heard it before...this type is what I'm attracted to...just so you know...beauty fades and muscles turn to flab...but a geniune heart is for a lifetime...


QUOTE OF THE DAY
"If you would thoroughly know anything, teach it to others." - Tryon Edwards

Just Be Happy!

I am slowly learning that in spite of it all...to be happy, live and enjoy every second of every minute...

Have a great Father's Day weekend....

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"Speak the truth, but leave immediately after." - Slovenian Proverb

Trim

It's another beautiful early am...sipping my daily libation of tea leaves...I'm thinking about yesterday and how upset I allowed the inconsideration of others ruffle my feathers...I guess my expectations are too high or for that matter-- my expectations should have been non exsistent...either way, thinking about it now and not in the heat of that moment...my reaction should have been nonchalant...but damn it...I cared about and take pride in the things I'm involved with...

Yesterday I happened to be in a conversation with two very good looking buff unmarried b-boy attitude hetros. Both of them have live-in girlfriends but they fool around and play the game with other women. It was amazing to note that even though they're alike in some aspects they play the game differently...one is honest with his "trim" as he calls them and lets them know upfront he has a main squeeze...and the other is not so honest because he wants to have his cake and eat it too. Leave it up to me though...I'll have both...lol

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"A good reputation is more valuable than money." - Publilius Syrus

History

At times I compare my life to days of old...Paradise was a serene untamed beauty back in the day before civilization as we were taught, fought and conquer what they claimed at the time was rightly theirs...interesting though they travelled thousand of miles from their home in Europe only to claim something they knew nothing about...then came slavery, piracy, bootlegging and the like...it sure seemed exciting but cruelty ruled...

When you compare history...it repeats itself...in modern times...in a different form but it's history repeating itself all the same...I may not be physically enslaved by a master...but yet...I'm mentally enslaved by me...and supposedly contained by worldly forces... my outcome is depended on me no matter the obstacles that faced me politically and socially...it's a hard road to travel...positivity, focus and fortitude has to be my guide...for my desire to live a happy life is ever present...

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"A goal without a plan is just a wish."- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

My Muse...

In reality it is valuable.
More powerful than any visible exsistence.
It separates class. It augmentates itself.
It is known for it's greed,
to a race called human.
It can obtain any form of pleasure.
Whether it be human flesh, to the destruction of the world,
by means of arms.
It is worshipped by those who have not.
And wasted by those who have too much.
Evidence of its popularity,
is shown in every corner of the world,
in any color, shape, or form.
A necessity maybe. A friend it is not.
It never lasts for long.
Wonderful, as it may sound, it saddens my heart.
For the one thing it could not get,
is the love,I have for you.

Copyright ©2006 DA

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"Never discourage anyone who continually makes progress, no matter how slow." - Plato

Questions...

Why do we say we want/need a person in our lives but then again we're not willing to go the distance?

For many of us when challenges hit a relationship we buckle, fold and called it quits?

Why is it some friends with their two cents don't know when the appropriate time is for their two cents?

Are your friends your lovers friends and where does loyality begin and stop with your former partner friends?

This one is tough...even for me...What is love to you....true unadulturated love?

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"He enjoys true leisure who has time to improve his soul's estate." - Henry David Thoreau

Life is...

Life is...breath
every second of every minute
we breathe
it takes us just one step closer
to living, enjoying and experiencing

Life is...me
and all that I make it...
through my ups of climbing mountains
my downs of swaying in the valleys
and in my in-betweens
my sadness and sorrows
strengthen me

Living life...is my purpose
In my purpose
I've found blessings
In my blessings,
I've found peace.

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"Sweet mercy is nobility's true badge." - William Shakespeare

Things that make you say Hmmm....

Have you ever realized sometimes when your chatting online, or on the telephone or just speaking with a friend and they asked a question that you intentionally not answer, avoid, change the subject or us blantant ones simply say...no comment...or give them the silence breaker...its none of your business...as much as they say they're not slighted they are...their tone changes....hmmm

You meet someone online for the first time...and within a minute they're asking you...your birthday, address, telephone number...personal shit...that comes with time, talking and a level of trust...and when your hesitant with the information or ask why you need to know it right now...it's like you then gone and committed a cardinal sin and they're writing their blog the next day talking about how people are shady...hmmm

Have you dated a guy but never was seriously involved however you were carnal with him more than once...when the hormones was jumping...and you lose track for a spell...and then he reappears at a party or club where you at....and your getting your mack on with someone else...and he approaches you, takes your hand as if he master of the universe because he thinks he has it like that and says lets go...I think not...nigga please your dick has been put to pasture...hmmm


QUOTE OF THE DAY
"It is not every question that deserves an answer." - Publilius Syrus

Stay Strong

I'm enjoying the last day of the holiday...here in Paradise had a four day long weekend with two holidays (Fri/Mon)...I spent two days working and these last two days...I spent with me...all alone with my thoughts and ideas...it's amazing how much work one can accomplished in solitude...my best friend Garfi traveled to Paradise's second city and my Cousin hit the ATL as usual...to be honest I did get a lonely bug for a minute...but I solved that digress with more work on my upcoming project...

I have this special friend...who will always be a special friend whom I chat with once in a while...that's been going through a moment...I read his blog often and even though I may not comment...I always keep him near and dear with pray...stay strong and know that I think of you often...just below a lil poem I wrote...

Take your memories,
bottled them in your heart,
treasure them each day,
for they are nutured in love.

Take your memories,
as death has no boundaries,
that love does not conquer.

Take your memories,
that lie within the depths
of your soul,
claim them for they are...yours.

Copyright ©2006 DA

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"To be mature means to face, and not evade, every fresh crisis that comes." - Fritz Kunkel

The Breeze...Again

The breeze is upon me this day...it's refreshingly kewl...do you feel it?

The slight breeze
sends a coolness to my warmth
easing the burden of today's sun

This same slight breeze
takes me away to another world
of visions untold as stories unfold

On this slight breeze
I feel my essence -- my mojo
as my inherent nature gurgles and rises
sharpening my senses as this breeze
invigorates my soul

I retreat within--and yet
the breeze catches me, swirls around me
softly it plays up with me--teasingly
whispering its notes in my peripheral exterior

Oh breeze, this breeze
soak me with your uniqueness
guide me with your precociousness
and leave me with your strength

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"Our lives improve only when we take chances - and the first and most difficult risk we can take is to be honest with ourselves." - Walter Anderson